This week I learned...Sometimes when we think we're being helpful, we're actually being arrogant.

Luckily this lesson wasn't from screwing up myself. I overheard two women in Starbuck's, talking
about one of their ex-boyfriends. She described how she sent him a copy of her resume, and how
he had the audacity to tell her, unasked, all the things that were wrong with her writing. I'm sure he
thought he was being helpful, but that's not the way she saw it. She felt it was proof of his sense of
superiority, and it proved to her what a loser he was. I thought, "I do that kind of thing all the time!"

Maybe when we think we're being helpful, it's a subconscious urge to prove how much smarter we
are, and we're not thinking about how that effects the person we're "helping."

Action steps...From now on, I'll try to check in with myself to be sure that my motivation is good, then
I'll ask if my advice is wanted before I give it. Finally, I'll be sure to say what I have to say with love and
kindness.

Take time to check in with yourself before you give advice. Is what you're saying wanted? Is it true?
Is it kind? Is it necessary? If you can answer yes to all four of those questions, proceed. If not, shhhhh!